Wednesday, February 14, 2007

My Grandfather And Others

As I deal with people, some of whom are very close to me, I think of my grandfather, whom I have mentioned before. He died of "fever" in his kidneys at 87 years of age, and it was said that if you listened carefully at his grave, you could still hear his heart beating. My point is that the way he chose to live was very easy on his heart. I never saw him excited, and his lifelong habit was to be 20 minutes early for everything. I remember him on Sunday, with the horse and wagon ready outside, sitting reading while waiting for the rest of us to appear. A couple of months before he died, he had mowed the front lawn carefully with a scythe, in preparation for our arrival from Halifax for the summer vacation, and then had run over a mile to help put out a fire at the creamery in which he held shares. He was part of a bucket brigade bringing water from the lake, and this is how he developed the kidney trouble that took him away about two months later.

With the exception of emergency situations like this, my grandfather was knowingly not under stress, and was always ready ahead of any appointed time. Not everyone is like my grandpa -- some like to see how close to the line they can come, and they frequently miss, some being late by a predictable 20 minutes, which seems to be the magic length of time to be late or early. For myself, I am on time for things. In fact, as a deadline creeps up on me, I resort to my training in radio and television before there was tape delay. This means that I tend to be about five minutes early for whatever is happening, and it is so calming that I do not know why everyone does not deliberately follow the example of my grandfather.

111 Comments:

At 5:10 PM, Anonymous Ook said...

I once read something about the psychology of tardiness. It said that chronic lateness is about feeling important. In being late, the tardy person treats everyone else with the same unimportance he feels towards himself while simultaneously calling more attention to himself.

I don't understand the connection between kidneys and a bucket brigade. Excellent story though.

 
At 5:30 PM, Anonymous Markus said...

Your grandfather was a wise man. And it's somehow funny to read that he was waiting with his horse and carriage ... seems so distant yet it's not so long ago! The times are changing fast ...

 
At 5:36 PM, Blogger Jackee said...

I have a problem with people being late all the time. Our meeting will have started and they walk in just enought to disturb everyone.I think it's selfish and self centered and we are punctual.

 
At 7:36 PM, Blogger Brandon Coop said...

Don,
I stumbled upon your blog by chance one day, and found myself intrigued that I can read about the thoughts of someone who has had the amount of experience in life that you have. I'm 23, and I am getting to the age where I'm starting to realize that there is an incredible amount of life experiences that I know nothing about. It is very interesting to hear what you have to say about all the topics you have written about thus far.
I've always wondered how people your age think of the world, the changes that have occurred, and the direction everything is going. Unfortunately, I am not very good at talking with generations older than my parents. It has been a barrier for me, preventing me from taking advantage of their wisdom. So, Don, thanks for the efforts you put forth with this blog. It allows people, such as myself, a chance to see things from your perspective. Oh, and also... I have to admit, I think it's really cool when people not born in the digital age are current on technology and the Internet. Keep it up!!!

 
At 8:57 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Maybe the reason your grandpa was always early was because underneath he was stressed about being late.

 
At 10:05 PM, Anonymous Mike said...

I'm one of those folks who is late all the time. Never really stresses me, my internal clock just doesn't tick right. Just the way it goes.

I've learned that certain personalities and outlooks are early, and some are late. Some have the appearance of being disorganized, some are very outwardly neat.

It boils down to how the individual was made. Being on time every time is like writing with my left hand (I am right handed). Sure, if necessary I'll do it, but it's counterproductive to be that way because someone else thinks it's important.

Yet I know other people are different, so I'm not going to ask them to change their whole world just to fit me. We can work this out!

Love your site. It's very thoughtful and well done.

 
At 10:16 PM, Blogger grouchosuave said...

I love the stories! Gramps sounds like my kind of guy: even keeled, self reliant and still on the scythe in his eighties (I bet there's no need to yell at the "damn kids" to get off your lawn when you are swingin' a scythe like the grim reaper. heh.) I hoping I'm still swinging the hammer like i do now at a ripe old age.

 
At 11:19 PM, Blogger vwsista said...

I've always wondered about chronic lateness. It always makes me feel unimportant when people don't show up when they're expected. With that said, I am always 5 minutes early so I end up waiting even longer for the late person.

I love your blog and I love hearing what you think. I'm interested in the older folks. I feel like there is so much to learn from you and I just don't want to miss out on anything. I have one living grandparent. She's 81 and is slipping mentally but is still a firecracker!

Thank you for talking to us.

 
At 11:35 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don,

I love your blog, and this posting was a life lesson in itself. The medical community keeps wondering why people are dying so quickly nowadays. It's our bloody lifestyle!

The Hawai'ians have a great saying: "Hang Loose".

It's now my life philosophy.

What was your most memorable day in your tv/radio work? I'm dying to know.

 
At 4:38 AM, Blogger Sheng said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

 
At 4:42 AM, Blogger almost famous said...

I know it is too late, but I still want to say 'happy Valentine's day' to you~~

 
At 5:02 AM, Blogger Carol said...

Your grandpa was a kind man always on time and a punctual person.

And hey, a belated Happy Valentines Day to you.

 
At 9:47 AM, Blogger gautami tripathy said...

I wish more of us did that. Most are always in some sort of hurry but when it comes to reach any place, they land up late!

I really hate it.

Love your posts. Lot to learn from those.

 
At 10:41 AM, Blogger Meenakshi said...

I really liked this post. Especially since I lost my beloved grandfather less than a month ago, a few months short of his 90th birthday. He lived in India so the last time I saw him was March 2006. My father (his son) went there for the last rites and found all his old diaries, essays and writings. Looking at your blog and thinking of him, the two of you would have gotten along famously!

Keep it up its great to read your thoughts..

Meenakshi

 
At 12:42 PM, Anonymous Christine said...

Procrastination has always been a present stressor for me. I don't know why I do it--the only time it's "worked" for me was in a University psychology course. I stayed up all night typing a paper on "Procrastination: Why People Do It" (due the next morning at 8:00 am), for which I received an A. My life would be so much calmer if I could take a lesson from the boy scouts and always be prepared.

I guess the only thing that you can say for procrastination, is that when it comes down to the wire, a person is less likely to over-think a situation, and just ACT.

 
At 2:28 PM, Blogger daxmaryrussel said...

Don,

I too love your blog, and this story about your grandpa is wonderful. And it reminds me of my maternal grandmother*, she was always at least 20 minutes early too. Sometimes when she had an appointment at 11 am and was going to be picked up at quarter to, she got dressed early inte morning and sat by the door waiting for 1-2 hours. Maybe she was a bit nervous and therefore early but I don't think that was the main reason - she probably wanted to take it easy and meditated a while. Like you say, this is very good so not to get stressed.

Moreover, you've written this blog post in a style that makes me feel calm... I cherish that.

Yes, I'm one of those people who always procrastinate and stress and do everything at the very last moment. Don't know why - it's compulsory, but I don't really want to be like this, so I'm trying and trying and when I succeed I feel so much better. There's a lesson learned.

* Swedish distingues between paternal and maternal grandmother/father, i.e. we have two separate words for it which I think is quite good and useful, but I'm trying to adopt to the English way of saying it.
Anyhow thought you'd like to know that
mormor = maternal grandmother, actually it's like saying mothermother if you translate it literally (mother's mother)
farmor = paternal granmother (father's mother)

Sorry for rambling.

Again, Love your blog - will definitely keep reading it, clicking on ads, reading people's comment (*very* interesting too)

Thanks Don and God Bless

Anita

 
At 4:46 PM, Blogger Mended Meanderer said...

I always live by my grandfather moto (after all he was a LIRR conductor for 38 years):

"It's always best to be on or ahead of schedule!"

Think of the stress relief some would experience just by waking up an extra fifteen minutes early in the morning. I bet there would be less accidents during rush hour.

 
At 9:23 PM, Anonymous Kevin Dewalt said...

Today I had 6 different meetings during my 11-hour day at work.

Had I shown up 5 minutes early for everything I would have wasted 30 minutes - 30 minutes which ultimately comes out of my time with my family because I would be staying later to catch up.

Had I shown up 20 minutes early for everything I would have wasted 2 hours and wouldn't last long in my job.

I admire your grandfather's approach but we live in a world he wouldn't recognize.

 
At 12:36 AM, Anonymous Anthony said...

I think being early it a great habit to form. It shows you care about the situation or the person or people you are meeting. My dad always left 15 minutes earlier than planned and if I wanted to be with him I had to be walking out the door 15 minute as well or get left. This habit has been of great benefit to me in my life as an adult but I've also lost respect for some that are consistantly unable to do things when they say they are going to do them.

 
At 9:56 AM, Anonymous Indrani Shanmugharajah said...

Hi Don,

Blog about your grandpa, reminded my dad, thanks.
My dad was very good in maintaining time. I never seen he was with strees. For anything may be office or social gathering, temple always he was early.
We used to say, his internal clock was wel set.
I don't how he managed everything without stress.
I was trying to maintain his life style,but........

 
At 9:10 PM, Anonymous Jose said...

I don't agree with the anonymous' comment. My first thought was that your grandfather was a very disciplined man. And as for stress, how stress can you be when you've developed the habit of being early over that many years.

 
At 5:49 AM, Anonymous Keith said...

I always make the effort to be on time, never early, never late. If something crops up and I can't make it on time I make every conceivable effort to inform the people concerned as soon as I can. If I arrive early I either wait in the car, or hide somewhere until it is time for the appointment.

I cannot stand people who arrive late for a meeting without a reasonable explanation. I am prepared to wait for 5 mins only after the appointed time, then I go.

It's just a "me" thing. If I am prepared to make the effort, then I expect others to do the same.

 
At 9:04 AM, Blogger princess said...

When I was growing up I was always told to be a little late for a party otherwise the hostess would think that I was so eager to start eating! That was from the females in my family. Then my Dad would always shout at us to hurry so we wouldn't be late for anything. Wish I had your wise grandpa around - I would have had a less stressful life.
Could it be that your grandpa didn't have time to go to the loo thus the kidney trouble? Just curious....
Belated happy Valentine's day to you, Don, and have a great weekend.

 
At 9:49 PM, Blogger BlogHore said...

My husband is like this - always early for everything. When he is ready to go and we (the kids and I) are not, we like to joke and say "We know, we know. We're going to be late for being early"

 
At 1:28 PM, Blogger Pradeep said...

I stumbled on your site while on a Google search for some topic related to blogging. (I keep researching as I am a journalist)

It's very thoughtfully written; and I must appreciate the effort to be in a medium that is so often identified with one highly populated by the youth.

I believe blogs have created a revolution in mass communication (just like mobile phones have done for interpersonal communication)

I hope to keep coming back to your blog.

 
At 2:56 AM, Anonymous Phiblógsopho said...

Great blog!

 
At 4:55 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I wonder why the bucket bridage brought the kidney disease to your grandpa.
Do give me an explanation of that,please.
Great blog,greater blogger!

 
At 5:56 AM, Blogger Accídia said...

My grandad use to do the same!!!
We need to learn.

 
At 9:48 AM, Anonymous Marianne said...

Don..:) I found your website after reading about you in one of the largest newspapers here in Norway. And I must say, it was one of the more fulfilling things I have done this day. Just by reading this first chapter about your grandfather, made me feel lucky to get to share from your wisdom and thoughts. Thank you for making my day..:) Have a nice weekend!

 
At 5:42 AM, Blogger Yianna said...

I just added your blog to my blogroll. You're a wonderful, thoughtful writer.
I'm in American who lives in Athens, Greece, where being late is the rule rather than the exception (it also doesn't help that getting around Athens is, at best, treacherous.)
Thanks for writing. I'll keep reading.

 
At 12:14 AM, Blogger L. J. said...

Thanks for reminicing...frankly I am not sure that anyone would hold on to what we have learned if it were not passed on like you have done here. I just heard of your blog today and have much more to read.

 
At 9:59 AM, Anonymous Monique Attinger said...

I read about your blog today in the Sunday Toronto Star. I am half your age (46) and have a 6 year old son and a 2 year old daughter. Your postings remind me that our stories are something important that we leave behind us, for those who know us and love us. I have many stories to tell, and some that are not yet even written. Those are things to remember as I continue in this life.

The fact that you are a "blogger" at 93 is astounding, and inspires me to be around for my son when he is 53 and my daughter when she's 47... I've always said I wanted to live until I was at least 90, and you show me that it can be done with fire in the belly and grace and questioning and life...

Thank you for doing this. We are a society that has lost its mooring, without the input and voice of our elders. We forget without those voices -- that wisdom and that perspective. We lack compassion if we do not care lovingly for life at both ends. In fact, we loose our zest for life in the middle (where I am) if we do not cherish both the beginning and the ending. You remind us that the "ending" isn't without its joys and learnings and passions either. In reality, it is full of those things.

I had an aunt who died with cancer about 10 years ago. Once, when I was visiting her, a care worker spoke to me about my aunt without addressing her directly at all. My aunt pulled her body up as straight as she could and boomed, "Speak to me if it's about me! I'm not dead until I'm dead!"

Indeed.

I will be back to read more...

 
At 12:04 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

What an insightful blog. I saw the article about your blog in the Toronto Star and immediately checked it out. Your heartfelt wisdom about so many aspects of living are so meaningful. I will continue to read as I hope you will be writing this blog for a long time. The beauty of it is that there is no age barrier between you and your readers.

 
At 2:00 PM, Anonymous Matt Keegan said...

I, too, like to arrive at my appointments early, usually 15 minutes ahead of schedule. This cuts down on stress as it also builds in some extra time in case something does go wrong.

A great story!

 
At 3:26 PM, Blogger Don Purser said...

Grandparents do leave an impression on us don't they? My Grandmother broke her hip just before my parents wedding day. She didn't want to miss the event so she checked herself out early from the hospital and walked with a distinct limp every day of her life thereafter. She ended up living about a month and a half past her 100 birthday. She felt that her life was complete because she was a great supporter of the royal family, and received her letter from the Queen on her birthday. May you continue living a full and happy life Don, as my Grandmother did.

 
At 5:13 PM, Anonymous jennifer said...

I stumbled upon an article about you this afternoon in the Toronto Star. The article reminded me of conversartions I used to have with my Grandfather. We lost him this past October 18th...I even remember the exact time (12:45pm) ...what I was doing... how my mom broke the news to me and how I felt. I sobbed, holding my 13 month old daughter in my arms, surrounded by my mom and dad. Grandpa was 86 years old and was probably ready to go about 5 years ago.
My sister, her boyfriend and I had seen him only 4 days ago. He had had a stroke and was admitted to the hospital in only a week before he left. I was the last of the three of us to leave the room. I remember his yearning look as I looked over my shoulder at him lying in the hospital bed...I don't think he wanted us to leave just then or perhaps he knew it would be the last time we'd see him. I went back into the room and held him, kissed him on the temple and whispered "You do what you need to do...I love you." Those were the last words I said to one of the most important people in my life.
There are just some things you're never late for.

Have a beautiful journey.

 
At 5:39 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Don: Met you several years ago at United Memorial Church in Halifax.You were a member of the Congregation and your Father was at one time the Minister if i am correct. Borden Tupper was the Minister at the time I was around.I used UMC as a sanctuary from a ghetto called the Manning Poll ,north Barrington St.I have always been very thankfull of the Church and people like Bill Orr, Barney Fenton,Clarke Crowll and Bob Demone for keeping me out of trouble.I played a lot of basketball in that small gym and set up a lot pins at the bowling alley both of which were built for the Navy WW11.I becacame a stockbroker on Bay St. and have lived in Toronto for the last several years.I use to enjoy your lectures at Queen Elizabeth High. Your doing a great thing,Don. All the best. Don Fisher bubby1937@hotmail.com

 
At 9:28 PM, Anonymous Jessica said...

That sounds like my grandparents. They were never "later" than 10 minutes early for anything.

I prefer to be early, but I've married a man with no internal clock whatsoever.

 
At 7:21 PM, Blogger Harry said...

What a great site and one that truly proves "All Retirees Are Authorities" Your site has been selected as Site of The Day by Best Pick Site Of The Day by Best-Pick.net Congratulations Don!

 
At 8:07 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don, Its the 27th of Feb. Im not rushin' you(cause I know you're not Russian) Just missing the knowledge. Tellng me something good.

 
At 8:55 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love your blog!!! A real pearl found amongst so many empty shells.

 
At 11:10 PM, Blogger Ben said...

Don, ignore PIERRE. He's jealous of your amazing insight and talent. I hope everything is going alright with you (you haven't posted since the 14th and I'm worried about you!).

I love every one of your posts--the insights, the genius, and even the poetic language you use.

 
At 12:17 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I read about you in the Toronto Star. Great blog. I had a friend who was always late in highschool- the only good thing that came out of it is that I got to know her father really well. When I read the article on the weekend you made me think of my Memere. She passed away 2.5 years ago. She always wanted to be a teacher- she taught from the book of life-just like you. Take care.

 
At 6:05 AM, Blogger bert said...

I would like to thank you for sharing your experience. My students learned about a very important stage in life. Your site was the focus of the lesson on the educational value of blogs. I hope that your grandfather continues to teach for many more years.

 
At 6:20 PM, Blogger nollie said...

Off topic, but have you ever seen the movie "The Notebook"? James Garner got himself a room and moved into the home where his wife of many decades had to live. Perhaps you could do the same & once again live with the love of your life, your first wife as you say. I can't imagine the two of you being apart after all of this time and you still seem so much in love. I'm sure the possibilities have all been discussed, but couldn't a nurse even come to your home each day and care for her? These are the types of situations our health care system needs to address with our aging population. It's just not right to separate you after all this time.

 
At 7:15 PM, Blogger Multi-tasking Mommy said...

This is my first time on your blog! I'm glad I came. Good for you for being up-to-date and using the computer, it can't be easy to tackle new technology. You are a good role model for us all!

I agree with being early for appointments/engagements, it does take the stress away! I feel late if I am less than 10 minutes early for something.

 
At 7:46 PM, Blogger nollie said...

According to the Toronto Star article from this past weekend, Don writes all of his posts by hand and then mails them to an anonymous family member who posts them on this blog. That being said, it is still wonderful that everyone is being given access to his history; advice & insight. I hope all is well Don

 
At 7:48 PM, Anonymous Eroc said...

Don,

I really believe the younger generation should have people like you actively in their lives. Some teenagers think they know everything, but its their elders who really possess all of the wisdome

 
At 12:00 AM, Blogger Mum said...

We are all starting to worry Don. Tomorrow will be March 1, 2007 and we have not heard from you since February 14th. That was a while ago. This I know, because I was on a cruise on February 14th and it seems like a long, long time since I have been warm. Please, just a little word.
Mary in Alberta

 
At 8:31 AM, Blogger princess said...

Where and how are you, Don? I hope everything's alright. I miss your posts, and I am sure many others, too. Take care.
Princess

 
At 10:12 AM, Anonymous ronnie johnson said...

What an inspiring thought...thanks for this tip...I have lost clients over the years from a former associate who was always about 20 minutes late for our joint appointments.....I no longer work with him and feel like a liberated human being on this green planet....no money is worth the worry......

'Down the road....,

Ronnie (author/minister)

8ministries.com/blog

 
At 12:18 PM, Blogger Rachel said...

Now that I have three children, I've found that if I aim to be 15 minutes early, I usually arrive right on time. I sometimes feel like the last person on the planet who is embarrassed by tardiness!

 
At 12:24 PM, Anonymous Indrani Shanmugharajah said...

Hi Don

What happened to You

 
At 12:48 PM, Blogger Annie Anderson said...

Hi Don,

Great blog!

And your Grandpa sounds a lot like mine. He was 78 when he passed away in 2005 of cancer.

I'm always early too - not quite 20 minutes, though - but usually at least 10.

Blessings,
Annie

 
At 1:24 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

HOW'S YOUR SEX LIFE?
HOW'S YOUR SEX LIFE?
HOW'S YOUR SEX LIFE?

PROUD CANADIAN

 
At 5:01 PM, Blogger Elderta said...

Dear Don, I read your blog sometimes, but never post. I wanted to let you know of a lady in Australia who has just started a blog at 107! Her name is Olive. I also posted a link to your blog on her blog... hope things are well!
http://www.allaboutolive.com.au/

 
At 8:57 AM, Blogger Women on the Verge said...

What wonderful memories! And full of such wisdom...

I'm enjoying your blog very much.

Ethel of wotv

 
At 12:34 PM, Anonymous thenakedsingularity@gmail.com said...

I miss Don already. :(

 
At 1:40 PM, Blogger Antonio said...

I'm worried. Why hasn't Don posted? C'mon Don, we miss your wisdom.

 
At 2:10 PM, Anonymous Ook said...

Well, I think something's happened. Don makes advance notice of breaks in his pattern that are a third the length of this.

But there has been activity. Posts were deleted. The thing is, Don's blog is administered by someone else.

I would expect a notice to be posted if tragedy struck. And I couldn't find anything in the news, which I count as good.

Best wishes and highest regards to you Don. God (i.e. the Universe) be with you!

 
At 2:11 PM, Anonymous Neeroc said...

As a procrastinator working on reforming, I would like to thank you for this post.

Hope all is well with you.

 
At 1:40 AM, Anonymous Biceps brachii said...

I'm glad to find out that you are a bloger.
Have a long life!

B.B.
Macedonia (Europe)

 
At 10:30 PM, Blogger Royce said...

Your Blog is a wondrous, colourful prism of powerful and motivating energies that reflect your magnificent wisdom, gift for words, perceptions and human-ness. THANK YOU!

 
At 1:32 PM, Anonymous Ellen Weber said...

Thanks for the moving story of a fine man. Was that the same Haifax, NS - where I grew up?

 
At 11:01 AM, Anonymous Lisa said...

Where are you Don? I have eagerly awaited another entry from you but haven't heard from you since Feb 14th. Is everything ok? I miss you!!!

 
At 1:58 PM, Blogger NotSoccer Mom said...

just found your blog. really enjoying it!
p.s. my dad is always early too and it rubbed off on me.

 
At 9:10 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Don,

Hope you are doing well. I am waiting impatiently for your new entry. Don't let us wait for long, we miss you...

Sally

 
At 7:58 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don - Miss you! Hope all is well...

 
At 6:38 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello Don,

I stop by often to see if you have blogged some more but nothing since Feb. 14th. I really enjoy your thoughts and observations on life. Hope all is well. I look forward to reading you again...

 
At 3:23 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

LOL HI

 
At 6:04 PM, Blogger KEN said...

Hoping all is well,
Ken

 
At 11:08 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nothing since 14th of Feb ... does anyone know why no blog since then ?

 
At 11:56 PM, Blogger Keith said...

Let's pray for Don. I hope everything is OK.

 
At 9:58 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don,

We miss you...I miss you. I hope you are safe and well.

We're all holding our collective breaths waiting for you to reappear online again to tantalize us with your wisdom.

 
At 1:12 PM, Blogger Dawn G said...

Hey Don..
A friend introduced me to your blog and I've gone thru it and have been faithfully reading it... but it's been awhile since you've blogged and I hope to hear your words of wisdom and stories again...

You've got fans all the way in the sunny island of Singapore!!

 
At 5:18 PM, Anonymous Pra. Neide said...

Oi Donald, prazer em conhecê-lo. Não sei escrever em inglês. Gostei muito do seu site, parabéns! Tenho 71 anos e também gosto de blogar. Desejo muitas felicidades pra você e sua família. Um forte abraço!

 
At 1:28 AM, Blogger Journeyist said...

I'm what you might call an reformed chronic late comer but a late comer nonetheless.

I can arrive early occasionally but only when I definitely, absolutely must. And yes I hate it when the other person comes in late! It makes me anxious thinking he must have arrived too early and left just when I was about to arrive.

I agree with mike (above) who said something like each one's internal clock must have been created differently...

As for me, I'm more in touch with my psychological or psychic internal clock that I often arrive late yet early enough to wait a little for the other person to arrive. They usually assume I was there on the dot.

Time is really a subjective reality experienced differently by each individual. I suppose we must learn to be more tolerant of other people's time perception in the same way that we respect their personal opinions.

 
At 2:42 PM, Blogger Johnny B said...

beautiful post, truly beautiful. we all enjoy the words you have to share. haven't seen a post for some time though, I hope your doing alright.

 
At 1:06 PM, Blogger lady macleod said...

I am in agreement with your grandfather on this one. I know my time is valuable, and I assume everyone else's time is valuable to them as well. I always have a book, and my fan to fill those "early moments".

 
At 4:00 PM, Blogger onelittlemustardseed said...

Love your blog...I appreciate so much your perspective on life...thank you for sharing the way you do!

I hate being late...partly because my own family always shows up for dinners late and I feel so unappreciated trying to keep the meal hot!

Even the church I attend starts late because it is filled with many procrastinators...lovely ones...but pretty laid back people...not that I mind because on Sunday's I find myself late trying to get everyone to church!

 
At 4:18 AM, Blogger Ashley said...

My comment has nothing to do with being on time, but I chose to write because you spoke of your grandfather. My grandpa had died just 3 months ago, in April, I was , like the rest of my family, surprised. But guilt was what I thought of, did I know him? I knew he was a proud person, who served in the air force but I didn't know him on a personal level. I didn't know how he felt about religion or politics, and I didn't know alot about his past, he wasn't much for words, yet I love him so much, and miss him. How can I love someone who I barely knew? I realized how consumed I was in my own life that I forgot about the bigger picture in life. My sister, told me something yesterday that made me think of him, she said " as we get older so do our parents and the time that we spend with them is important" and it's true, when your young your so excited about getting older that you forget that as you age so does everyone else. You just expect that they will be there, since they are always there, like my grandpa was.
I also think of his hug, its strange, how I have hugged him so many times in my life, that when I did hug him I would get the same feeling as brushing my teeth, its routine, and now I miss the feeling of embrace so much, something that I long forgot to appreciate. Something I know I can never feel again. I suppose you miss something when its gone.
I think I might have dragged on a bit, but anyways, I really enjoy reading your blogs!

 
At 9:30 PM, Blogger Lliam Ryan said...

My father died at 85 last year, in that warm spell between Chrismas and New Years. We were in shirtsleeves at the graveyard, and that was fitting.

In his later years, his goal was to die in his vegetable garden, with a shovel under his foot and the sun on his brow.

The weather turned bitterly cold the next day.

As a young child, he had a foot deformity and couldn't walk well. The family horse had been trained to pull a wagon, carrying my future father, down the backroads to a one-room school house out in the country, drop him off, and make the journey home.

In the afternoon, the horse hauled the empty wagon back to the schoolhouse, picked up my father, and brought him back to the farm at Shanty Bay.

The foot issue was resolved and he went on to have a normal working life on the railroad. During it though, he was always in the car 20 minutes before anyone else was ready to leave. When we got to where we were going, he was always in the car waiting for everyone else to leave. He seemed to always be chasing after the grass on the other side of the fence.

He died, not with a shovel under his foot, but surrounded by medical technology that is confounding even to the techno kids of today.

He found it novel, and interesting, and he was curious to know how it worked but, to him, it was just another new thing in a life filled with new things.

In his final days, he wasn't focussed on the things and technology though. He wanted to know what was happening to him, and what was happening to the people around him.

The technology is just stuff. The people we came from and the people around us are what our conscious world is about.

You've been a great teacher during your time with us. You created institutions that will live on.

Thank you for continuing to educate and inform us on the internet. Thank you for keeping the shovel under your foot when others would have tossed it aside.

 
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