Thursday, November 09, 2006

Cannibals All (or: You Eat What You Are)

Most forms of life on earth, including humans, lack the ability to manufacture internally all the chemicals needed to sustain themselves. To obtain these substances, they eat other creatures that can manufacture them. This happens all the way up the food chain. At the top we have ourselves, who eat just about anything, including vertebrates, crustaceans, plants, fruits, insects, the lot. Put differently, we eat our fellows who eat their fellows. And if that's not cannibalism, please explain what is, while I take time out to have some shrimp, mushrooms, and a nice pork chop.

Seriously, the best food, or at least the best protein, is that which is most like our own. Of course, eating others of our kind gives rise to social problems, and is rare as a result, but it happens. In times past, among some of the Pacific Islands peoples, since a butchered human very much resembled a butchered pig, it was referred to as "long pig". I presume these cannibals ate only their enemies, not their family members, no matter how tasty they may have looked. Most of us have accepted that humans are precious in the sight of God, while ordinary pig, or "short pig", is OK nutrition.

Disturbingly, the fact remains that protein is best when nearest our own, but religious leaders, politicians, and relatives are against what this implies. Long pig is nutritionally ideal, however stick to the shorter variety. Next time you're stranded on a desert island with a small group of people, and you're tempted to change your ethical stance, ask your priest or lawyer first. Fish is good.

28 Comments:

At 12:30 PM, Blogger Bev Sykes said...

Well, removing the taboos against eating "long pig" is one solution to the population problem. But I dunno. I don't think those "lady fingers" would make a very good tiramisu.

 
At 7:18 PM, Blogger Kay Dennison said...

And think of the trans fats! lol

 
At 1:54 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

While the protein most like your own is best, you also run the risk of contracting nasty diseases.

 
At 11:58 AM, Anonymous ken collins said...

Feeding cows to cows resulted in mad cow disease.

 
At 12:22 PM, Blogger SwaG! said...

As far as disease risk goes, you just need to make sure the long pig is well-done.

 
At 12:29 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

There is a fascinating book on this topic by Beth Conklin, called (seriously) Consuming Grief.

 
At 12:41 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cooking doesn't tale care of prions, which are the culprits behind both mad cow disease and kuru.

 
At 12:45 PM, Anonymous Eric said...

Yes, but not eating brain / spinal cord tissue does solve that little problem... it does mean no scrambled brains for breakfast, however. The Australian cannibals will be disapointed.

 
At 2:23 PM, Blogger Mindbleach said...

Fantasy: Dolcett.
Reality: Kuru.
Google at your own risk.

 
At 2:39 PM, Anonymous CB said...

yeah, 'best protein' depends on the definition.

All you need to know about Kuru (although there is an interesting documentary out there as well):
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kuru_(disease)

 
At 7:48 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

reminds me of something churchill said:
"Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals."

Which says as much about us as pigs.

 
At 12:19 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Isn't it long pig because we taste like prok??

 
At 8:18 AM, Anonymous dogu4 said...

According to a recent piece I read on the subject, some cannibals who eat human flesh from within their own community do so by convincing themselves that their victims have ceased to be humans and in fact have become witches, which are perfectly fine to eat. Seems odd but we make a very similar mental construction when we differentiate between the animals we eat and pets.

 
At 6:37 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Where you say "the best protein, is that which is most like our own", how did you come to that conclusion ?

Nutrients obtained from food need to be balanced out against other nutrients for optimal use. Excess nutrients are excreted when passing water, stored in the liver or kidneys.

The prime reason for eating meat is really to do away for the need to balance out nutrients obtained from eating ourselves by taking them from an animal that has already done the job of digesting, and thus balancing out the nutrients. Other reasons for eating meat include the availability of food in harsh climates.

The proteins obtained from meat are actually not that great for us as there is a lot of digestion to be done to obtain them.

 
At 12:40 PM, Blogger Saskboy said...

I think a fellow named Swift talked about eating small long pig a few Irish generations ago. :-)

 
At 9:22 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think you'll find that it's not just the enemy that was consumed. Take a look at this link for more info.....
http://www.as.ua.edu/ant/bindon/ant570/Papers/McGrath/McGrath.htm

 
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At 7:55 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

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At 7:58 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

well acully removing the taboos agants eating is imposible to my calculation like ken said all you are really doing is killing are animals killing our food also so if crul peole do that those animals can come itstinked and then us humans can die

 
At 7:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

buy the way i am only 10 come on pepole

 

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